I've been feeling it lately. The 20's rut. I feel down, stressed, pressured and every other emotion you can think of. There's been good times and bad times and incredible times mixed with the I want to curl up and cry days. Doing what any good twenty something would do I whinged to one of my friends who is always ridiculously positive.
I felt a little low because I thought I had made a few good new friends through Twitter, in hindsight I was probably just having one of those days, but then something happened and I though "oh I obviously wasn't as good a friend as I thought" when in reality it was nothing of the sort!
I text my friend and asked her if I was likeable and she replied with: "Yep, always feel that too. Honestly it's a very common thing. So many people in theirs 20's start feeling like it. It's because we're changing from school, college and being out all the time drinking and making "friends" we feel that loss when we start to grow up and have jobs etc. I've read so much about it that I'm not saddened by it at all."
This sparked my attention because it was comforting to know that I wasn't the only one. Next thing I know Jenny Marston throws up this amazing post and I sit there reading it going yep, yep, yep, this is exactly me.
So here's some things to remember:
Someone else is going through the same thing as you. Proven by my wonderful friend tell me she feels it too. However, she is right. With life getting in the way it's easy to feel like you're not doing it right, but you are.
Nothing you do will be 100% original. You'll always be influenced by other things and that's okay. As long as you're not copy and pasting or changing as little as possible then you're not copying. Look at all the people who blog about the same things. Same ideas personal spin.
Not knowing your future is okay. Like Jenny said: just because you're 23 and don't know what you want to do for the rest of your life but someone you knew at school is living their dream life does not mean you've failed.
Self-care is as important as being social. Don't forget to schedule in a night for yourself. Take a long bath, read a book, whatever just have done me time and tell the world to move on for a night.
Manners cost nothing. Being polite to people and showing respect towards others will get you much further than being rude.
Normally, or so I've found from experience, you'll be in one of three places; the baby route where you've had babies young and are figuring everything else out on the way, the job route where you have an amazing job with amazing pay and living the life of Riley or you'll be where I am. I'm working a dead end job, trying to get my side hustle going along with trying to be an author all the while thinking I haven't enough of a wage to warrant having a family just yet and all my friends are doing ridiculously well.
Jealousy sets in and your mind heads back to the depression route. You gotta remind yourself that just because they are already there (especially if they are older than you) that doesn't mean you won't get there eventually. Everyone has their own path and as long as it's what you want from it then whatever everyone else is doing doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if you fail either. Pick yourself back up and remember you can do this, just not that way.
I've learned the hard way that being envious of your friends doesn't get you to where they are. Hard work does and that's what matters. Being jealous is fine as long as it's fueling your fire not dampening it.
Have you been in a situation like this recently? What are your tips that make them better? Let me know in the comments below